welcome!

Whether you've reached this blog willingly or by force I'm happy to have you here.
ersi marina's workroom is always open to the public, even when I am not in. Sometimes I need to sleep.
And to paint.
And to play with my four cats.
My name is Ersi Marina and I live in Spain though I was born and grew up in Athens, Greece. I kept it all very Mediterranean.
This blog is a means to share my work and snippets of my life, as well as to be in contact with you all. I hope you'll enjoy your visit.

Monday, 7 July 2014

update on life

Hello dear friends. I haven't been around here for a long time, I have missed volumes of your blog posts and my work has also suffered the effects of my absence. Because this is how I generally felt all this time, absent and somehow inconsistent. Τhings have been difficult.

a passage along Villanueva St., Beceite, Spain

Two friends died in May, the first one quite unexpectedly. She was also a neighbour in the same apartment building where I live, a member of our local artists' group and my fellow cat-keeper as far as the street cats are concerned. Her name was Lilianne and she died from a heart attack, she probably never realised what was happening. It was me who found her in her apartment two days later but I won't go into details. It was a shock and we were all stricken by her sudden demise.

Then ten days later, on 21 May, another friend passed away. Isabel's death was not unexpected, she had been sick for a long time but still, it was a blow. She was the long-time partner of one of the members of our group. After attending the funeral, I think we all looked furtively at each other wondering if these things always come in threes. May seemed a bit colder and the poppies looked a bit darker this year.

bright, cheerful poppies belie our gloomy feelings

Many street kittens born in April died too, some of them tragically. I won't go into details here either but each little death was a very sad blow and it was me again who found them -being the person who takes care of them and is closest to them. I wish I had a house with a huge garden, then I'd take them all in to shelter them from danger. By mid-June it felt as if a huge vacuum cleaner had swooshed over our heads sucking in lives.

Those events have a lot to do with my absence online and also with my difficulty with carrying on with my projects.

poplar trees and exhuberant Spring growth

On Friday 20 June I started working at the Exhibition Hall again, just in the weekends. The photograph above is my view from the entrance to the Hall, an optimistic sight to sooth the spirit. On the left, barely out of the frame, is the gravel path that leads to the venue.

wildflowers, wild patterns

Wildflowers grow along the edge of the path, at the feet of an old stone wall. This shot is from a previous year but things look pretty much the same every Spring. The rhythms of time, a diary of life and colour.

I am working on my piece for the Personal Histories exhibition. It was also on hold for some time, unable as I was to free my feelings from sorrow. A certain melancholic mood can be very inspiring for me (a romantic in disguise) but downright sadness is not. I guess writing this post means I am opening to the world again.

17 comments:

  1. Lovely to see you back but sad about the reasons you have been away, loss is a hard thing to bear and I hope your work will help see you through this difficult time.

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    1. Thank you Debbie! My feelings are calmer now, I still feel sad but it does seem to be a great obstacle any more. I really appreciate your comment.

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    2. Of course, I meant 'it doesn't seem to be an obstacle...'

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  2. Oh my dear Ersi...my heart is aching for you and the losses in your life. Sending a big hug through the interpixies.

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    1. That interpixie hug was just what I needed, Jennifer! It helps let go of those who left. Thank you and hugging you right back :-)

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  3. sorry about your losses. i'm glad to see you back here and hope each day will be a little brighter for you.

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    1. Thank you for your sweet words, Deanna. The passage of time helps a lot -and these summer days too. Life is smiling all around.

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  4. Dear Ersi, what a sad, sad time for you, and I'm sure it was a shock to be the one who found your neighbour. Sometimes the cheerfulness of things around us only highlights our own pain, but it also reminds us of the cyclic nature of life. Take care and be kind to yourself. xx

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    1. It feels a bit as if we'd suffered an earthquake, only it didn't shake the earth but our feelings. Things are slowly getting back to normal and I try to kindly push them that way too. Thank you, dear Amanda.

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  5. Dear Ersi, what a time you have had! So much sadness and loss is very hard to come back from, and even losing the kittens is such a blow. Your photos are so beautiful, I hope you are gaining comfort and strength from your summer surroundings. Sending love and hugs your way and courage too. xox

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    1. The arrival of summer helps a lot, even more so because the weather is rather cool and rainy. It doesn't contrast too much with my mood but rather accompanies the bitter-sweet feeling of moving on. Thank you for your considerate words Carol, they accompany me too.

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  6. I am so sorry for your losses...it is hard to lose friends and animals...I pray for your peace of heart...and that you will feel inspired by life once again...it takes a little time to heal.
    Susan Jensen

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    1. Peace of heart is what I really need the most, Susan, thank you very much for your kind words and wishes! At least now I am able to work on my projects again.

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  7. Hi Ersi- I've been away from blog reading for a while and just read your post. I'm so sorry for all your losses. I hope that the summer brings you renewed energy for yourself and your artwork. Love Julie

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    1. We've both been away, Julie. I haven't been able to read your latest newsletter yet though it's right there in my inbox. Marked with a bright red star, so I won't forget. Summer does help and so do your warm wishes. Thank you! XX

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  8. Dear Ersi - what a terribly hard, sorrowful and difficult time it has been. On top of all the other worries of the world. I hope you are finding your way through, it is good to see you back here. I like the notion of heart-peace very much; and I think we all know the feeling when it arrives; and the yearning for it when it is absent. Go well, go gently.

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    1. It's wonderful to hear from you, Fiona! Yes, you nailed it: 'On top of all the other worries of the world.' It's been an overwhelming couple of months. I think that real peace of heart is nowhere near (me or Spain) but I do feel better now, trying to do some meaningful creative work. Thank you. xx

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